I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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