The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
