Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You're my little dorito
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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