It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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