Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
