i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize