Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
