He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
