I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
