i barfeds in our rink
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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