Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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