dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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