Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
