The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
And then he peed in my hair
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