my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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