Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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