he puts the penis in happiness.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
i've created a new STD.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize