Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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