I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
