I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
