That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize