Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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