I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
