i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
