Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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