I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
