i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
