we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize