I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize