Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
