Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Randomize