only if we run a train.
done.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
