either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
