The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
