Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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