We won't sleep together?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
