question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
