I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It's shark week go big or go home
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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