I bet he comes in French.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
