Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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