i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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