I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
