I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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