We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
