Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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