Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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