i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize
