he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
everyone is single if you try hard enough
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
