What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
