hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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