Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
