Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
i need some magic done to my vagina
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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